you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
This baby is an asshole
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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