The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Randomize
