So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
My legs feel like baby dolphins
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize