It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
