I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
Randomize
