addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
