I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
