Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize