google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I feel like a drive thru vagina
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
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