we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Drunk is a universal language darling
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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