I just made out with a guy for $7.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
The power of my boobs compel you