***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I'm passing your future prison.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
