I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
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