Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
