So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
