Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
