that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize