Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
