I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize
