belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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