just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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