How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
