I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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