nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
