with your own penis?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
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