why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Randomize