He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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