I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize