This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
