i would punch a child for taco bell
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
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