i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
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