Those balls look pretty dangerous.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
