i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
