Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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