i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
