it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
