Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize