the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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