Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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