Sry I called you an 8
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Why are your pants in the freezer?
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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