so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Randomize
