Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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