Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Randomize
