my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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