it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
