So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
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