Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize