so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
