Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
