I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
